I'm thinking about Songs for the People by Frances Ellen Watkins Harper where she says
"Let me make the songs for the weary,
Amid life’s fever and fret,"
There are days when it's hard to get going, days when tomorrow seems more alluring then the moment we find ourselves amidst. This morning as I was worshiping in the car, I was brought into reflection of all that I've experience, all the pain and joy. The days and moments of sacrifice in secret, all for the striving of exercising excellence the hopeful reaping of rewards in heaven. There are fruition moments where it all makes sense. I think about 1 Corinthians 13:11-12, one of my top 2 favorite scriptures, which talks about how while now we know only in part, but then we will know fully. That's the promise I'm holding onto today.
This past Sunday I was installed at my church a co-chair for our Young Adult Ministry, and the song "I Give my Self Away" started to play as I descended from the balcony to the alter. Filled with steps of anticipation, I arrived ready to be prayed over and prepared. But then Pastor Moss said I want you to keep you eyes open for this one. As he began to pray and posture us for the coming call, I cried. My body began to flood because of it all made sense. the Bible studies God called me to lead, the way he's allowed me to minster to the people around me with my testimony, the path of servant leadership that my parents and grandparents have paved, it all made sense. I wanted to fall to my knees but I couldn't because I felt God telling me to stand, I will strengthen you. My mother, standing right next to me, while being endowed with the same message, consoled me by bracing my back with her hand. I was held up by the one who went before me.
The book I'm reading Veneer elevated this quote by Theologian Alistar McFadden which said "Christ is beyond us".From this position he comes to us, calls us to Him and so calls us o become what we truly are". There's so much mercy mixed inside this notion, that because He has gone before us, He is the one who can guide us and gift us the sight and sensitivity needed to serve where we are called.
There are times when the daunt of the day can be so draining but this is a valuable truth to center on. The reason God brought me back home, the reason he has me in this profession, the reason I am where I am is because He's getting me in position. I can not advance if I am not in position and He's saying that the reason you are dwelling in what can feel like this dark place right now is because I am showing you my light. May God continue to use our circumstances to bring about clarity and usher us into a greater truth.
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